Recently I was talking with some of my dear friends.
There’s been a lot going on in their lives – probably much like your life, right?
Sometimes I wish I could offer the perfect words to heal a broken heart, but try as I might, I guess that’s not my superpower.
We all know, though, there are moments or situations in life where there are NO words that can change the trauma or hurt or brokenness.
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• There are no perfect words that can heal the heart of a parent who has just heard the diagnosis of their child.
• There are no perfect words that can mend the brokenness in a heart when someone you love finds out that the person they were supposed to be able to trust, has actually been deceiving them.
• There are no perfect words one can offer that can undo a trauma response because of abuse.
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So – what can a good friend do in those moments, when they can’t take away the hurt?
This is the question I wrestled with.
I am confident this isn’t the only answer, but this is what came to me:
Hurt is heavy.
Hope lightens the load.
Don’t misunderstand me, friend –
I am not suggesting you blindly turn away and hide from the pain.
Even I, a relentless hopeful optimist, will tell you – there are times when that’s not the best fix for your heart.
Ask me how I know. ;)
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There have been times when I would have rather tried to power through pain by burying my head in the sand and trying to mind-over-matter the trauma.
The funny thing about that is, it always finds a way to rear its ugly head again… and it always seems that ugliness comes out at the most undesirable times.
The reality is, hurt takes time to heal.
BUT -hope helps sustain us in the journey toward healing.
There are lot more times in life when things don’t have to be “either/or.”
In many cases, we serve ourselves better when we can find ways towards “both/and.”
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If you find yourself in a season of hurt, may I encourage you to find ways to carry hope in one hand while you carry your hurt in the other.
Remind yourself of what is true and good and right –
Remind yourself of all the reasons why you’re going to endure through this season of pain-
Remind yourself what you’re going to find on the other side of the mountain…
Lighten the load on your heart by choosing to fight for and carry hope along with the hurt.
